Immediate vs Delayed Pleasure

Lately a theme has been resounding in my head. God showed it to me this week, my preacher spoke of it last night, and I read about it in the Bible this morning. It is the concept of immediate vs delayed pleasure, or, put another way, obeying the flesh vs obeying the Spirit.

For a long while now (sadly, a long while translates to a few years), I have been torn by my own version of this struggle. My flesh shouts, "Yes, gimme now!!!" And the quiet voice of the Spirit whispers, "Get away, you know you can't handle it." More often than not the flesh wins, and afterwards, I am wracked with guilt and shame. I mentally, and sometimes verbally, abuse myself with harsh words of condemnation. "You're pathetic! You're of no use to God! What does He want with a loser like you!" Words I would never let someone else say to me but somehow are stikingly true when I say them.

But this struggle I, and so many of you, endure is because we don't want to wait for the delayed pleasure that would come from not giving into these immediate pleasures the world offers. How often do we take shortcuts or get ourselves drunk on the thrills of today so we can be "fulfilled" now?

How did we get so focused on NOW NOW NOW! Is it because we are so self-centered? Is it because we have a hole in a hearts that we are trying to fill with anything, everything? Is it because pop culture tells us we have to have a perfect body, a boyfriend or girlfriend, lots of sex, the best car, the best clothes, and the best house to have true fulfillment and happiness?! Is it because of this emphasis on HAPPINESS rather than on HOLINESS, a word I'm sure is not even in the vocabulary of a very large proportion of the world's population?!!!

All I have ever gotten from submitting to my flesh is addiction, heartache, guilt, shame, self-condemnation, depression, pain, lied to, weight gain, a gulf between me and my God, a gulf between me and my family, money lost, isolation, and an even bigger hole in my heart. A horrid little list, isn't it?

So why do we keep doing this to ourselves? Why can't we see past today to eternity? Well, if you are not a Christian, you don't really have a choice; you are a slave to your sin. The only way you can be rescued is by admitting your need for a Savior and by giving your live to Christ. But us Christians, what is our excuse? It's simple: we have gotten our eyes off of God and onto ourselves. We have literally told God to shut up.

Let's turn back to our Father, our one true Love. Let's get some people to hold us accountable (I did!). And let's see if it won't kill us to wait, to trust, to practice some self-control, to say no to our old life-stealing habits. Let's see if God's delayed blessings won't be way better than any temporary high.

Lies and suffering

I'm sick of it! I am SICK of Satan's lies ripping my family apart!! My family is already in pieces, and after the events of late, the pieces are bound to be more and more ravaged.

I often long for the days of my youth and of ignorant bliss when I knew no imperfection in my loved ones, when everyone got along, or so I thought. It's just not the same anymore, and family and home do not hold the same meanings as before.

It doesn't help that almost no one in my family is a Christian. They follow their own ways and are easy prey to the seductive lies the world whispers in their yearning ears. I guess we can all fall, given the right circumstances. Just in this particular situation, I can see more clearly than most the truth behind the deception because I lived it, too.

I wanted so badly to be wanted, needed, and loved that I sold my soul for the world's inferior and twisted version of love. I bought it hook, line, and sinker. But, by God's mercy and grace, I came out on the other side with the experiential knowlegde that love is so very blind when you are the object of your love. What I mean is that when we want a love to satisfy our own longings, instead of to glorify Christ, almost any halfway decent person will do. We will lower our standards, we will stay in situations any objective person would know to get out of, we will tell ourselves lie after to lie to justify our decisions and to make them make sense.

It is a shame how many girls and women feel they have to run into the arms of a boy or man to feel loved and whole, complete. I was one of those girls once; I know that longing that never seems to be satisfied. I think probably 99% of us aren't shown the kind of love and adoration by our fathers that tells us we are worthy to be loved and that we deserve only the best, no second-rate, ripped off version of it. So we run out to look for it, anywhere, everywhere.

And even more sadly, many never find it. They never come to know the kind of love that Jesus offers. The kind that isn't given based on your looks or personality or what you can do for Him. The kind that doesn't ask everything and offer nothing. The kind that doesn't decide He fell out of love and is tired of trying. The kind that says, "I love you not matter what, and I will always love you. You can never do anything to make Me stop loving you. You are a precious and beautiful dove. Fall in love with Me, and you will have life abuntantly. My love is extravagant, and I can't wait to show you it's healing tenderness. Come after Me, and I will come after you."

Bullseye...or not so much?

Is life all about hitting the bullseye? The perfect, no-room-for-error, dead on bullseye? If you're like me, a confessed perfectionist, then life is about that. A perfect life w/a perfect body, a perfect home, a perfect GPA, a perfect family, perfect friends, a perfect schedule, a perfect relationship with God, and a perfect story to tell. Well, none of those things describes my life, at all.

I did have a perfect GPA...until last semster, and, you know, it wasn't so earth-shattering when I lost it. I had held onto the idea for so long that I HAD TO HAVE a 4.0. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. I thought that was the only way to make my parents proud of me, and it was a source for my own pride, disguised by self-deprication, of course. I thought it was the only thing I could do well. Fortunately, somewhere along the way I realized that a perfect GPA is really not that important AND school is not my only strength.

Last night at church, our preacher posed the question, and I am paraphrasing, "Is God's will really a perfect bullseye as we have often made it to be, or do we have more freedom than we think?" When he brought up that point, I wanted to jump for joy! What if he was right? I had never thought of this before. Is there a chance that God is not a rigid, demanding perfectionist as we've made Him to be? Could He really care more about our faith, obedience, and love for Him than us hitting the perfect mark? And is there even a perfect mark? Maybe God's bullseye is wider than we thought. How exciting this is!!

Does this mean that I (and you) do not have to wait on a burning bush and God's audible voice to make a decision or act? I think so!!! What freedom! I feel like I could fly!

As long as our actions do not go against God's clear will as stated in His word, let's go! Let's step out in faith and in the perfect freedom that only Jesus can give! Stay close to Him, and He will stay close to you as you go out and get close enough to the bullseye!

***I just want to state, for clarification purposes, that what I've said is not meant to be a liscence to sin or to disregard God totally in making your decisions. His word is always the final authority of our lives as Christians, and we would be foolish not to consult it. I am simply saying that His good and perfect will may give us more freedom than we had thought.

Consult God's word always!!!

1 Peter 2:16 "Live as free men, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil; live as servants of God."

Psalm 1

Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers.

Not so the wicked! They are like chaff that the wind blows away. Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.

For the Lord watches over the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked will perish.